A mother and daughter’s advocacy story: Alana’s reflection

When I was a baby, my mother saw I hadn’t learn to crawl and wasn’t appearing to achieve other milestones that were expected of me. My mother took me to a clinic where tests were run and I was diagnosed with a development delay. When I started school, I knew I wasn’t like other children in the way I learnt and wasn’t keeping up in the classroom. My mother took me back to the clinic and I was diagnosed with an intellectual disability. I remember my mum was advised I should be put in an institution but my mother said I’m not going to give up on my daughter - and instead give her the best life possible.

My mum truly meant her word. She made sure I was given every opportunity. In school she made sure I would receive the best assistance outside of the classroom. Unfortunately, due to my disability in school I would get bullied by students and even teachers who didn’t understand my disability! But my mum will always support me to speak up.

When I wanted to do dancing there were a lot of dance schools that turned me down, a participant with an intellectual disability. But my mum kept advocating until there was a dance school that took me. My mum had the ability to get people to get on board to see my potential. This led me to continue on to be in mainstream dance classes until this day.

When I was 17, I was coming home from work and as I got off the bus I unfortunately was hit by a car, sustaining a fractured skull and acquired brain injury. My mother actually gave up her job to take care of me and assisted me in recovery. It was a selfless act but is the kind of person my mother is, putting her children first.

In 2016 I was nominated for, and took up position to be, a Living Life My Way NDIS Disability Ambassadorship. It would require travelling across NSW in a public speaking role, sharing my story, promoting the NDIS, and inspiring others on how they can achieve their NDIS goals. I wasn’t independent enough to travel on my own, so my mum travelled with me across NSW and supported me with my talks. My mum would sit through so many talks. Surely my mum must get bored of hearing these! But my mum was always smiling through every talk and would just get prouder and prouder. My mum gave me the confidence to grow as a public speaker.  It was through this ambassador program I got head hunted by a disability organisation that offered me a public speaking and advocacy job, which eventually lead me to speaking at the United Nations in 2019.

On this Mother’s Day, I want to take the time to show my appreciation for what my mother has done for me. My mother has stuck by me through all the highs and lows.  My mother raised not only me but also my brothers, who have disabilities too, all on her own. I call her super mum! I would not be the person I am today if it wasn’t for my mum. I wouldn’t have achieved the things I have achieved if it wasn’t for the devoted support and unconditional love my mother has shown towards me - and continues to do so.  The greatest lessons I have learnt from my mother. She has accepted and been patient with me, therefore I am accepting and patient towards others. She made me see the importance of inclusion, standing up for my rights (when legal matters did occur in adulthood, I knew how to address them), and persistence and determination.

I want to not only show appreciation for my mum but for all mums out there that have raised a child with a disability, that devoted their lives to their children. It’s hard to raise a child, but raising a child with a disability does have its further challenges, especially when having to take on the advocate role. Giving your child with a disability the best life you can has its rewards no matter how long the road may be. I know personally I am thankful.

Don’t forget to give your mum a great big hug and remind her from time to time how much she is loved and appreciated.