Disability support and everyday choice: needs, wants and late nights

I need to pay that overdue phone bill. I need to eat better and exercise. I need to finish folding that ever growing pile of washing… did I mention previously that I have six kids?

However, I want to go to the pub with my mates on Friday night and watch the footy, and I can’t tell you what time I will be home. I want to take my partner out for dinner at that new winery that just opened up near us. And I most definitely want a new smartwatch that I hear everyone talking about (I guess the phone bill will have to wait).

Ever since I started working in “the field”, I have heard government services, policy makers and media talking about people with disability getting their needs met. But what if someone wants more than just their needs met? What about having their wants met?

I can choose to go to the pub on Friday, come home when I want, and even fall into bed without having a shower first… I know right, outrageous!

However, for many people living with a disability, this is not a choice they can make as easily as I can.

In my previous blog, I mentioned that I had been working in the sector for over 20 years, but I didn’t tell my story of how I got into the work. So let me share some of that and in particular the story of a young man I met very early on in my working career.

I had graduated from university with a journalism degree (remember that dream I had of working for _Time _magazine, well it’s not an easy job to land), and I was driving taxis to earn some money. I got a call one night at about 2am to come in and change into a wheelchair accessible vehicle and pick up a young guy at a nightclub. “Sure, no worries,” and off I went.

I collected “Daniel” (obviously not his real name) from out the front of one of Geelong’s biggest and busiest nightclubs at the time, and took him home. It became quickly evident that Daniel was having a great night, and maybe had one or two refreshments too many. He was about 22, and I was the same age and could definitely relate to him and his very happy and talkative nature that night. He proceeded to tell me about the band, a girl he had been talking to and how many Jaeger Bombs he had drank (again, if you have to, Google it), and then casually dropped in that he had missed out on getting a shower and help getting into bed because he had chosen to go out instead.

I enquired a bit more as this was all new to me, and he explained that the agency that he received help from could not provide a worker to wait around for him to get home and he would not commit to being home at a particular time. What was more shocking to me was that he only had funding to get four showers a week and because he missed this one, he would have to wait until Monday for his next one (it was Saturday night).

I got out and helped Daniel into his bed that night, and became his regular driver, which then led to me working with him and then onto further studies and full-time work in the sector.

I have not seen Daniel in over ten years, but I think of him often whenever I hear talk of meeting people’s needs.  

We all have needs, but like Daniel, our wants sometimes take priority.  

I hope that Daniel is still out there in Geelong getting his “wants” met.

I hope he does not have to wait two days to get a shower just because he “wanted” to go out.

I hope one day an agency, government, policy maker or service provider starts talking about how people with disability can get their “wants” met too, or as well as, but not instead of their needs.

Adam Williams is a community development and disability champion with 20+ years in private, NFP and government sectors. He’s a father/stepfather to 6, 43 years young, and passionate about true inclusion for all.