Mental resilience and wellbeing: support without blame
Connecting the dots between mental illness and mental resilience
By Nicole Gamerov · Originally published 13 April 2016
Original article
As a mother of three young children, I find myself putting as much effort into their mental well-being as I do into their physical and emotional well-beings.
Before going to bed at night, we have a barometer check on our “happiness index”. Without annoying them, it allows me to better understand how they have coped with the ups and downs that the day invariably has presented them with.
This is an opportunity for me to share and connect with my kids and talk about the issues that have demanded their mental resilience.
Sharing and connecting on this level I believe is the first step in building mental resilience in kids. As a mother, I would like to instil in them an awareness of the importance of developing mental resilience as well as an understanding of how mental resilience relates to mental illness. This resilience “armour” will see them flourish and rise to the challenges that each stage of their lives throws at them– and gets stronger with each new challenge tackled. Connecting the dots between mental resilience and mental illness provides them with vital skills, which may ultimately save their lives.
Our society puts so much emphasis on physical well-being which is understandable because as humans we focus on the parts we can see. But what about the parts we can’t see, like our mental well-being, which is as important? How aware are we as individuals of the connection between our emotional capacity to cope and our physical state?
For parents with special needs children, building both their own and their children’s resilience, is an important factor in determining how the family unit will cope day to day and whether or not they will thrive and flourish.
If you think I might be overstating things, let me share with you some sobering statistics, which I recently came across:<sup>1</sup>
One in five (20%) Australians aged 16-85 experience a mental illness in any year.
Almost half (45%) Australians will experience a mental illness in their lifetime.
65% of people with mental illness do not access any treatment
The proportion of people with mental illness accessing treatment is half that of people with physical disorders
[Clickability update, October 2026: These figures are historical. ABS 2020–2022 study findings report 21.5% of Australians aged 16–85 experiencing a mental disorder in the previous 12 months and 42.9% across their lifetime. Measures and periods matter; do not treat the original list as today’s data.]
Of all the statistic quoted, perhaps the most startling for me relates to depression, which is the number one cause of non-fatal disability in Australia. The World Health Organisation estimates that depression will be the number one health concern in both the developed and developing nations by 2030.
And so if nearly half of us will experience some form of mental illness during our lives, should we not be talking about it more, both individually and collectively?
Simple questions like:
What do we mean by mental health?
How can mental resilience protect us against mental illness?
What skills should we be teaching our children, to help manage mental illnesses such as depression or anxiety?
These are topics which adults find hard to talk about it, so how can we better equip our children to share on these topics? In my opinion, the “KIS” (Keep it simple) principle never fails.
I recently came across a UK Government funded program, which promoted five simple ways of achieving well-being. The simplicity and universality of the principles really appealed to me. Are these things you can easily build into your day, without much effort?
Connect with people around you. Making connections and having supports will enrich your everyday life
Be active – discover a physical activity you enjoy and that suites your level of mobility and fitness
Take notice – be curious and appreciate what really matters
Keep learning – learning helps build confidence and can be fun
Give – Thank someone. Smile. This helps understand how your happiness is connected to the wider community
My experience has been that the connection between mental well-being and mental illness is not as well understood, as one would expect. In a 24-7 world, where society places ever-increasing demands on us, do we allocate enough time to our mental fitness, just as we do to our physical fitness?
Most of us understand the link between remaining active and fit and our physical well-being. But do we appreciate the importance of developing coping mechanisms and skills, which could protect us against mental illness?
How many of us delay our own recovery by thinking of mental illness as exactly that – an illness rather than seeing the connection between mental illness and resilience?
[Clickability update, October 2026: Mental illness is not a failure of resilience. Healthdirect resilience information describes coping strategies and seeking support; these are not a substitute for assessment or treatment.]
1. Black Dog Institute, Facts and Figures about Mental Illness and Mood Disorders
Nicole Gamerov
Nicole is a mother of 3 children and has been working in the world of reinsurance in the area of disability, climate change, disaster risk reduction, food security and resilience. How insurance relates to these topics can sometimes be misunderstood but once we start talking about “resilience” the link is quickly made. Nicole is leaving the reinsurance world and is throwing herself headfirst into the disability sector.
Clickability editorial update: October 2026
Make room for feelings without requiring a positive answer
Ask how the day has been and listen without making the conversation a test of happiness or coping. Children may communicate feelings differently, and not wanting to talk immediately is not a failure. Keep support accessible and adapt conversations to their age and needs.
If a concern persists or affects daily life, discuss it with the appropriate health professional. Healthdirect suggests seeking help as part of support. Family routines and connections can help, but they cannot guarantee that a child will avoid mental illness.
Choose coping support alongside the care you need
Notice which activities or relationships help you manage a difficult day and what makes things harder. You can try a manageable change without expecting it to solve every symptom. Ask for practical help or time to rest when needed.
Discuss ongoing concerns with your treating team rather than judging yourself against another person’s coping routine. If disability-related assistance is needed, describe that need clearly. Mental health treatment and NDIS disability support have different purposes and should not be assumed to cover the same costs.
Does resilience guarantee prevention of mental illness?
No. Coping strategies are not a guarantee or replacement for care.
Are the original percentages current?
No. Later ABS findings use a specified study period and population. Official guidance
Find practical support around your daily wellbeing
Tell Clickability what disability-related assistance you need. Compare reviewed and rated providers and discuss support that fits your routines and preferences.
